empty

its not about the cubs. really its not.

they lost. im getting over it. they play like chumps when crunch time comes. ive come to accept it. i really dont care that much. even though i discovered it later in life, i love baseball, and always will. i love the cubs too, but ive always been realistic about them, and their inability to close the deal.

the emptiness i feel is more about the season in general.

i felt at peace skipping from game to game. checking in on old favorite players, keeping tabs on the pennant races in every division.

and in postseason, with no one to root for, i can barely be bothered to turn on mlb gameday, much less make plans to mooch off someone else's cable tv to catch nationally televised games. as much as i hate to admit it, with the playing field narrowed, the only team i only even marginally want to win is the dodgers, so that maddux can maybe end his career with another ring. too bad that would come with another ring for manny the douchebag as well.

watching baseball, all 162 games per team per year is what i really enjoy. no, i dont watch every team's every game. there arent enough hours in the day for that. but its comforting to know all the games were out there, just waiting for me to turn them on.

and through this season, there's even more more to love. im not talking about individual players accomplishments, like thome's 500th HR or el loco toro's no hitter.

im talking about the consistency in baseball. every day for the months of april, may, june, july, august, and september there is baseball played, and every game is important. every game is special. every game is beautiful or ugly in its own way.

a starting pitcher who gets worked over in one game will come back will find his stuff and be unhittable in his next. hitters streak hot and cold, with no apparent reason. a team slumps, then comes back and makes their fans remember why they still watch.

i have my favorites, of course. ive never rooted for any of his teams, but to watch kyle loshe get bounced around from team to team, and finally settle in with st louis, BEFORE the post season is over for 4 years is a reason i love this game. big frank thomas, who left a bad situation in chicago to go to oakland and then into an even worse situation with toronto before coming back to the As and their fans, who love him is another example. and even though he couldnt find the strike zone with a GPS in game one of the NLDS, ryan dempster's transition from a closer who could only pitch an inning at a time, to a starter who never seemed to need extra rest was awesome.

there's going to be a lot of drama this off season. not just with the cubs, who have disappointed their fan base, again, and will need to fight to win back their loyalty. not just with the white sox who seemed to fall apart close to the end of the season but still made a great run to get to the playoffs and won an infinitely highter number of games than the cubs in the post season. however, they start the off season with a lot of open postitions to fill and decisions to make.

i'm excited to see what will happen when players file for free agency, who stays and who goes, and where they go. the playing field is leveled back to zero when the world series is over.

but there isn't trade/signing news every day. and definitely not the same volume as when games are being played during the season.

cuz once asked me when i get over my post-basball season funk. the answer is easy -- february.

the void that the off season brings can only be filled by one thing -- the start of spring training in february. and it seems so far away right now.

the season's not even over, but i miss it already.

pain, continued

i have a hangover. my head hurts. a nice physical manifestation of the pain of the cubs getting swept.

i feel stupid for having been optimistic this whole season.

winning the division looked like barely a struggle for the team. scoring a run was beyond difficult once oct 1 hit.

i dont get it. was it the pressure, the expectation of 100 years? it didnt seem to bother the guys all year. i spent enough time this week yelling at the team for playing poorly. there is no point in reaming them after the fact.

there is not going to be a logical explanation for their collapse. larry hagman asked me this morning, "why don't you just find a new team?"

if only it was that easy.

who gives a shit

mlb.com ran this story today, about how torn some yankee fans are over pinella vs torre in the NLDS. both have ties to the team, while the dodgers have more former players from the yankees' nemesis, the boston red sox.

here's my question: who gives a shit what yankee fans think?

someone really should have thought about that question before running this lame-ass excuse for a story.

the best part of the MLB playoffs this year is not having to listen to baby steinbrenners whine about how unfair the game is to the yanks when they invariably lose (as they have the last several years).

thank you, i'll be here all week. try the veal.

heartbreak and hope

for the 2nd year in a row, the new york mets miss out on the post season with a loss to the florida marlins on the last day of the regular season. pretty stinging. shea stadium goes out with a wimper, rather than with the roar of a post season game.

im sure the team is disappointed, but probably not as much as their fans. its hard to let go of the season, and to lose when you expect to play another day is shocking.

im watching the closing ceremonies at shea. the crowd is pretty subdued. not surprising. it hard to applaud for old people you dont know when you team has just broken your heart, for the 2nd year in a row.

in other news, both the twins and white sox won, so the season goes into extra innings. the white sox will face rock's brother, freddy garcia, at the cell tomorrow in a make up game with the tigers. garcia, who won a world series with the white sox in 2005 and recently asserted that he had no friends on the team, that he was a tiger now.

should be a good game. the white sox are fighting to stay a contender for the AL central, and im sure detroit is annoyed about having to play a game after the season is over.

heres how all 4 games i watched today ended up

cubs 1, brewers 3
marlins 4, mets 2
indians 1, white sox 5
royals 0, twins 5

thats a lot of baseball. but i wouldnt have it any other way.

last day of the regular season

its incredible. 162 games in the regular season, and there are 4 teams still battling for playoff spots on the last day of the regular season.

thanks to mlb mosiac, im watching 4 games at the same time, white sox vs indians, marlins vs mets, cubs vs brewers, and twins vs royals.

mets and brewers are tied for the NL Wild card, a win by one and a loss for the other determines the winner. should both teams win or lose, they have to play a tiebreaker tomorrow.

the white sox are 1/2 game back of the twins. their situation is more complicated. a twins win and white sox loss eliminates ozzie's crew. if both teams win, the white sox have to play a make-up game against detroit on monday, if they win that, sox and twins play a tiebreaker on tuesday. so the sox have to win 3 in a row to take the AL central.

today is a big day. pennants are up for grabs. a timely hit, or a misplayed ball can mean the season for a team. pretty exciting, and im sure nerve wracking for all the fans involved.

im glad i can sit back and relax. the game against the brewers is more or less a scrimmage. the cubs already own the best record in the NL, and are just trying to keep their winning rhythm in place for the start of the playoffs.

but i have have to recognize how important a day today is, even if its not for my team.

162 games in a season. and it all comes down to today. amazing.